How it started. Through the grates eyes, searching for signs of her presence.
A lusty reconnaissance mission. How it started and ended, years later, unresolved.
Grainy sidewalks, streets, glossed over, fantastic. Beyond reproach.
The cold and unfeeling. It wasn't winter. No one came of age. Reeds did not swallow whole nights or twilight meetings. Now that's healthy
Dressed in white, my princess departs. I let out my hair. Clouds disperse, dispense with.
It was great. Really great. It was possible, to feel such intensities from that enormous distance. First the red notebook, then the blue, which is missing. No, the red is missing. That was the good one. Where I said, Yes I am in love and with whom, and how deeply. The legitimacy of the claim infiltrates this day. The notebook, held by misunderstanding, the impostor.
Eyes, grates, how it started, searching through her presence for signs of. Mission, a lusty reconnaissance. And it ended how and started, later unresolved, years.
Fantastic, glossed over, sidewalks, grainy streets. Reproach beyond.
Unfeeling and the cold. Wasn't it winter. Of age came no one. Whole twilight nights or meetings did not swallow reeds. That's now healthy
Great really. Was it great. Was it possible, that enormous feel, intensities, such from distance. Blue, red, no, the red, is missing first, which notebook. The good one that was. I said where. Yes, love, I am in and whom with, deeply, and how.
This day infiltrates the claim of the legitimacy. Misunderstanding held by the impostor, the notebook.
It, eyes of her presence, streets started how grates through signs. And it ended a sidewalks lusty reconnaissance mission and unresolved started years later, grainy. Fantastic reproach, beyond glossed over. wasn't it no one came cold, unfeeling winter of age. Nights, now healthy meetings, that's the story, working out from these nights of knowing better now all that was needed to be known, to love.
At seventeen, a throwout behind the flow of college bound guppies. I wasn't alone. Lived with Gramma in the elderly complex just long enough to find a job. It was against the rules for us to be there, duffel bagged, sofa bedded. Even though I said don't, Gram washed my panties by hand but not my comrade's, who was white, unrelated, and presumed extremely dirty. Petunia left for a crash pad near the Fens. I followed. Four of us, Migdalina, her brother Sherman. and us two slept Migdalina's basement 9 x 12 room. Later our friends gave Migdalina a few bucks and slept there too if they somehow missed the last train to wherever they lived, which happened more often than not. Six could fit along the width of the twin bed. The one bathroom on our floor was nasty and so was the only kitchen. Migdalina said to take the lightbulbs with me after I was done or somebody would steal them, so I stole one of them giant flashlights from Woolworth's. There was a man with a burnt-up face who stood in the hallway in the dark. The kitchen stove blew up in his face the year before, he said. I didn't believe him, but he wasn't really skinny. Everybody in the rooming house stayed out on the front steps, because it was July and there were a lot of steps. The neighborhood had a good mix: Black, white, Puerto Rican, Laotian, families, students, hoes, drug fiends, and us. Almost all the buildings were brownstones, and there were some trees.
I worked downtown at the Cookie Jar. So did Petunia. A dollar nineteen for six little cookies. Sold bread, too. I knew a bunch of cute boys who were breakdancers. Lino, Nozz, Tron, Cisco, Nolee D. (onetwo, onetwo) little Six-Pack and sometimes a girl named Dana. I gave them big free drinks everyday. If I had to work 'til closing they would come and get me. We were supposed to throw away all the leftover food, but that was much too stupid for me to understand. I gave the boys what they wanted and took the rest home. When I didn't have to work, I hung with them. Carried the radio while they danced, rocked the brim for those moneybag tourists at Faneuil Hall. Sometimes somebody got hit in the head with a flying Puma. Sometimes they wouldn't let Dana rock with them or would treat her bad. Me and Petunia got loud about that. When I wasn't with them, I hung with Zip as the lookout while he spraypainted his tags, or nice big pictures on a building or something. He blinked a lot. Everywhere I went
I saw Zip's tag. He was in competition with another boy named Bang or something, but Zip's tag was clean and tight.
Two women lived upstairs, J. and V. M. got uptight when they were on the steps, and went in. One day, them came down with Her. She made me want to stare, so I looked at the trees, or across the street at people coming down the alley from Symphony Rd. The alley between Her house and Cappy's Pizza. Her thick golden brown hair. Then it was black, then she shaved it bald, then dyed it blue, then relaxed it. She was a hairdresser at a Newbury St. salon. She never talked to me. I saved my money.
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