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:: Hypoglycemia : Matt Bernstein Sycamore ::
The train gets to Penn Station and I'm hoping my trick's hot because I'm horny as hell so I wouldn't mind getting off. I'm meeting him at his office nearby, on my way there a bunch of people are selling counterfeit train tickets and there's a guy with a bullhorn saying DON'T PURCHASE TICKETS OUTSIDE. I get to the building and go upstairs and buzz the trick. Turns out he's this aging hippy with stringy hair and a scruffy face. I smile and say nice to meet you.

We go into the office and he lays some sheets down over the rug. I say what would you like to do, and he walks over and starts kissing me, but his breath tastes like pot and rotten cheese, so I lean my head to the side and run my hands up and down his back while he kisses my neck and starts to unbutton my shirt. We take off our clothes and then I lie down on the sheet, he lies down next to me and puts his arms around me. He kisses my neck and I kiss his shoulder and move my hands all over his thighs. He grabs my dick, then leans over me and licks one of my teats, down my chest. I put his hands on my chest so I'll stay turned on.

He moves his lips around my dick and I'm hard and he's licking the shaft of my dick and over my balls and he's grabbing my teats. I move his hands to my armpits and he keeps licking the shaft of my dick and I put my hand on the back of his neck. I want to say take it in your mouth, but I don't know if he's into that sort of talk, so I just moan every time he gets close to my cockhead, hoping that he'll get the hint.

I'm glad the blinds aren't drawn, because I like to have a view when I'm getting my cock sucked and my attention starts to drift. In this case, I'm looking out at a wall of windows, and there are infinite possibilities for people to eavesdrop. I picture every possible cliché-- the bored office drone, hard-on in slacks; the horny construction worker, overalls pulled down for access; the salivating old man, fantasizing about a piece of me. All I see is a woman in a mauve suit, and it does look like she's got her eyes on me. Funny.

Then the trick stops sucking and lays down next to me so I get on top of him and start licking one of his teats, down his grey-haired flabby chest, to his dick. I take his whole dick right into my mouth and then suck slowly up and down. He puts a hand on the back of my neck and that gets me going, I start sucking fast and then slow and then fast, pulling on his cockhead and then tightening my lips around the shaft. I can tell he's going to come, so I start jerking him off and sucking the cockhead, then just jerking, but he keeps stopping me from getting him off so I jerk more slowly like I'm not in a hurry at all.

He grabs onto one of my hands and I pull on one of his teats with my other hand and go back to sucking his dick. Then I move my hand down and start jerking slowly with his dick still in my mouth. He starts moaning like a seagull and I move my mouth off his dick and he squeezes my hand and says slowly. I jerk his dick slowly but firm and he starts cawing again and then he comes. I lay down next to him and play with his balls, he says oh that was so sweet.

We get dressed and he says I have these two friends coming up from D.C., one of them's my age and one of them's your age, and I'm wondering how much you'd charge for about two hours with all of us. I say three-hundred, three-fifty. I don't want to make it too high because he might be a regular. He says great, they'll be down in a few weeks and I'll give you a call -- but I'll call you again before then too. I don't want them to know that I'm paying you, though. Let's just say we met at a bar on Christopher Street. I'm thinking the other guy my age is probably a whore too and we'll both be pretending we're not; that ought to be fun.

I kiss him goodbye and then I go downstairs and realize I need to eat right away. I stop at a corner store and get one of those whole wheat rolls with the walnuts in them, then walk towards Zen Palate because that's the closest place where I can eat, even though I'm sick of it. Then I remember Zen Palate doesn't have a bathroom except in the fancy part, so I stop at the Virgin Megastore to piss, notice that they're playing the Spice Girls movie in Times Square. Talk about depressing. Of course I get distracted by the listening stations at Virgin, and then I'm hypoglycemic and I can't stop staring at this enormous picture of Celine Dion, thinking what's going on? Finally I get a grip and get outside, buy some almonds and I'm walking along Eighth Avenue all wired and disoriented and I can't find Zen Palate. I call them and it's on Ninth.

I eat and then I crash, it's nightime and I'm in Manhattan and I don't know what to do. I read a story about a guy who's a high class whore in Hong Kong; the story's dull. I don't want to go home because I feel too sad and exhausted, not really horny but craving some sort of temporary intimacy. I figure I'll walk over to the East Side Club because I'm sick of the Chelsea boys at the West Side Club. I don't have a clue who goes to the East Side Club, but I'm curious. Though it'll probably just be East Side yuppies and tourists from the Midtown hotels.

I'm walking over to the East Side and then I realize I'm hungry again, so I stop in this pastry shop with big glass windows that has a grilled vegetable and tofu sandwich. They microwave the sandwich but it tastes okay. It's just me and the two guys who work there, so I watch the people at Sbarro across the street while I'm eating. Then these five guys come in and they're just standing in the doorway singing reggae songs or something in this staccatto, threatening way. I can tell something's going to happen, I'm thinking maybe the store's going to be robbed so I'll just pretend I don't notice. I'm kind of scared but mostly just frozen.

Then all the sudden there are pastries flying around the room, and at first I think they're being thrown at the guys who work there, then bouncing off the wall in front of me. Then pastries start hitting my jacket, a scone pounds me in the face and explodes onto the wall. Then a few more break apart against the wall and then the guys leave.

I've got pastries all over me and my food and the guy behind the counter comes over and says sorry, I'm sorry, I'll make you another sandwich. I say don't worry about it. I go into the bathroom to breathe, realize I'm kind of shaken. I don't know what just happened, I guess it was some sort of bashing, even though today I'm dressed all normal for my tricks and I don't know whether I look like that much of a fag. Maybe I just look like a different kind of fag. Or maybe the guys were drugged out and throwing pastries at the whiteboy seemed like the right thing to do.

I feel like when I did that porn video and all they said beforehand was will you be a bottom. Got there and before I knew it there was spraypaint all over my shirt, a hood over my head and a collar around my neck. Got dragged through gravel and then they wanted to make me eat dog food. That's the only time I said blue which was the code word for too much. I said I'm vegan. Then we went back to business. When I left, I felt like suddenly the world was different and slow.

Now I'm exhausted but I walk over to the East Side Club anyway, get there and I decide to wait outside for a few minutes to see who's going in. I wait about fifteen minutes and only two guys go in; they're pretty frightening. So I walk over to catch the train. I get on the F and figure I can transfer to the J and go home or get off at Fourteenth Street and see what happens. I decide to go home -- I'm completely drained -- but then I get off at Fourteenth Street. As I'm walking out, I link eyes with this guy who's kind of hot. Then I turn around and he turns around too. Then we both turn around a third time and I smile and motion him over.

I wait on the steps for him to follow me outside. I can't very well follow him onto his train, I mean I could but it seems easier for him to follow me out. He walks up the stairs and stands right next to me. He says what's up. I say I'm just bored and horny, how about you. He doesn't say anything. I say you want to walk over to Union Square? He says how far is that? I say two blocks that way and I point. I say it's a beautiful night. He says okay.

We walk along and exchange names and what train we were taking and he asks what do you do for a life instead of what do you do, which I think is nice. His name's Joe and he's an actor. We walk to Union Square and then we end up talking about plays, he's interesting enough and it's still warm outside. I say do you want to make out, and he looks around, I say not here? I keep looking him in the eyes but I can't tell what he wants and then he finally puts a hand on my pants and I put a hand on his pants. He's moving around to find my dick and his is already hard. I move closer.

He's looking all around, I mean it's true that Union Square is brightly lit and there are cops all over, but no one really stays in the park, they just walk through. He says have you met people here before, and I tell him a story about this guy I met. It was raining that night but I was too lonely to care, sitting in the park because I couldn't think of anywhere else to go and it was kind of warm. This guy walked up and we smoked the rest of his joint and talked for a while, it was kind of romantic. He asked me if I wanted to go over to the peepshows on Third Ave, we went into a booth and I started kissing his neck and then he opened the door and left.

I don't tell Joe the part about kissing the other guy on the neck because I can't figure out whether Joe's straight or gay. Joe says what're you into? I say I'm pretty versatile, I love to suck dick and I love to make out. Joe says he likes to get fucked, I say I'd like to fuck you sometime. Joe starts to slide his hand into my pants and my dick's getting hard now and I'm grabbing Joe's dick, but then someone walks toward us so we both sit up. Then all's clear so I unbutton my pants. Joe grabs my dick and immediately I'm hard. I'm trying to pull his dick out but he isn't exactly helping me.

Someone else walks toward us and I throw my coat over my dick and kind of laugh, keep jerking off. Joe moves away from me a little until the person passes, but then he moves back next to me. I unzip his pants and take out his dick. Joe's grabbing my dick really hard and staring at it and then looking around us, back and forth. I say do you want to go to Stuyvesant Park, it's darker there. He says where's that. I say two blocks that way. He says what time is it. Midnight.

Stuyvesant Park is too crowded for Joe, and we can't find anywhere else that's even half-private. We're walking around and I'm hoping this isn't going to end up in nothing. Finally Joe brings me to this park in between two tall modern buildings, he says how does this look? I say perfect. There's a circular concrete bench that's kind of in the dark and you can see anyone coming long before they arrive. Sure, the people in the buildings have a prime view, but I'm into being watched, just as long as there aren't any cops involved.

So we sit down and right away he says can I suck your dick? Then he unbuttons my pants and bends over and sucks. I put my hand on the base of his neck, he's doing okay but he can't take much of my dick in his mouth. Someone walks toward us, so Joe sits up and I put my coat over my hard-on and grab Joe's thigh. The guy passes, I say my turn and I unzip Joe's pants, bend over and take his dick in my mouth. I taste his precome right away, I love the sweetness. I'm sucking fast because I want him to come in my mouth, but then he says quick get up so I sit up and he zips his pants.

There's this guy running towards us with his dog, but then he turns around so I relax though Joe's still tense. Then the guy comes running back, and running all around but not really looking at us, I say why don't we jerk off. Joe says I don't know, I'm grabbing my dick under my coat and I hold the coat up so Joe can see my dick. He says you've got a nice dick. I say thanks, he says how big is it? I say bigger than a baseball bat, but Joe doesn't laugh.

The guy with the dog is still running around, and then he walks over and sits about as close as he can to us without leaving the grass. I say looks like he wants to watch. We sit for a while and the guy's still there, pretending he's not looking. I say at least he could stare and then leave. At first I thought he was a fag, but now I figure he must be straight because otherwise he'd either stare or come over or at least say something. Or get away. Instead he's sitting there smoking a cigarette and pretending he's not looking at us.

Then the guy smokes another cigarette. And then another. I want to say bitch go home, but I don't think Joe would be into that. I want to grab Joe's dick, but he's too nervous. Joe says what time is it, I say 12:45, he says maybe we should go. I say let's just wait another few minutes.

Finally the guy leaves, I say you wanna get off now? Joe takes out his dick and says tell me about fucking me again. I take out my dick and we're both hard. I grab my dick and I say you sit down on my dick, nice and slow, just the head in your asshole at first. I play with your dick and kiss you on the neck and move my hips up and my dick slides further into your ass. Nice and slow. Then I put my arms around you and pull you all the way onto my dick. Squeeze your chest and kiss your lips and hold my dick all the way inside you. I pull your neck around towards me and we start making out and you're moving up and down on my dick and I grab you again and hold my dick all the way inside of you while it spasms.

I'm getting into the talk, Joe says are you close, I say I can come any time. He says do you shoot far. I say it kind of depends, sometimes I do and sometimes I don't. He says I love it when a guy shoots far. I've got my hand on his thigh and he's got his hand under my balls. He says I think I'm ready and I look over at him, I know I've got that look in my eyes when there's nothing there but sex; I've studied that look when I jerk off in the mirror and it's hot. I jerk my dick and I stand up a bit and try to clench my asshole because I think that helps me shoot.

Some of my come shoots about a foot or two and the rest gets on my fingers, I figure that's a pretty good show. I lick the come off my fingers and Joe starts zipping his pants. He says I don't think I can come. I say are you sure? He says yeah, it's really late. I say you're just going to be up longer when you get home. He says yeah, but I don't think I can come here. I say okay, button my pants and put on my coat. I'm thinking I can't wait until spring when there will be more horny guys out on the street.

We walk to the subway and Joe's kind of quiet. I say I'll give you my number and you can come over and I'll fuck you sometime. We get to the subway. I say you want to give me yours? He says I can't -- I live with two guys and they're straight. All the sudden Joe looks worn out.


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